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I don’t know if this is another holiday put together by the greeting card companies or not, but apparently May is National Masturbation Month. From Mate Find:

I just read at Libida.com that May is National Masturbation Month. They give you 31 hot ways to masturbate for each day of this month…. can you masturbate 31 days in a row?
Libida is a pretty cool site, with everything from Live Chat, Astrology, how to give a blowjob, to Erotic Stories. So if you get bored sometime and want to try something new, check it out… yeah its free too!

Well, to answer her question, yes, you can masturbate 31 days in a row. If you couldn’t they probably would have opted for February.

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I guess Paris Hilton is trying to pull a Traci Lords on us, and is going to try and make a run at being a mainstream actress.

I read this at Mate Find:

Last month Paris Hilton had a quest spot on American Dreams. She played the part of Barbara Eden, the former star of I dream of Jeannie. I did a search for of pictures of Paris Hilton in her Jeannie outfit, and found an original one of Barbara Eden. I thought Paris Hilton looked pretty damn good! You compare!

You can check out the pictures of Paris Hilton and Barbara Eden here.

Well, I looked at the pictures, and I am sorry Ms. Hilton, you may suck good cock, but when it comes to I Dream of Jeannie, my childhood forces me to give my love to Barbara Eden.

I think it goes without saying that if you are in a courtroom, you probably should not whip your cock out and start beating off. Well, tell that to the judge . . . please. I found this at Celebrity Sex Tape Scandals:

BORDEAUX, France - A French judge was placed under official investigation for “sexual exposure‘’ in a courtroom, prosecutors said after a newspaper reported the judge masturbated while a lawyer pleaded her case.

The 39-year-old judge masturbated for several minutes last week while listening to a female lawyer addressing the court in a case dealing with a dispute between neighbors, regional paper La Charente Libre said.

You can read the rest of this weirdness here.

I am really do not know what to say. See, back in the day, White Cheech used to work in the field of law. I also used to date a really hot female attorney. I can almost picture us acting this little scene out at home. But in a courtroom? Hell, I would even turn off my pager so the vibration did not give me a hardon. The times are a changing I guess.

Well, your honor, I have a solution for you, Adult Friend Finder. No matter what your style is: blondes, brunettes, redheads, teens, mature, Asian, Latina, and probably even a shemale or two. You can most likely even find yourself an attorney that will let you jackoff in front of her, without you risking losing your job.

If you want to join in the fun tonight, I highly recommend that you check out Adult Friend Finder today, get laid tonight.

As I announced a while back, Fucking Jerk Off, the adult porn forum is having a small contest where the prize is a lifetime membership to Sex Pictures Pass AVS.

All you have to do is refer the most new members. The contest ends April 4, 2005, so get it in gear folks.

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I have not visited Celebrity Sex Tape Scandals in a while, but happened to stop by today and noticed this story:

Supermodel Seeks Retraction From Jenna Jameson Over Flirtation Claims.

Although Jenna Jameson generally prefers not to kiss and tell, she decided to dish just a little about a few of her celebrity encounters in her best-selling book, How to Make Love Like a Porn Star. Cindy Crawford was the one person mentioned in the book who was upset enough to demand a retraction.

Last week Jameson received a letter from Cindy Crawford’s trial lawyers demanding a retraction, removal of the offending passage from any future printings of the novel, and a handwritten letter acknowledging that Jameson was entirely incorrect in her assumption that Crawford was hitting on her.

Okay, so I am supposed to think that Jenna Jameson can’t tell when she is being hit on? Yeah, I believe that.

It just so happens that Jenna gave me an autographed copy of her book when I was in Las Vegas at the beginning of the year. I have been reading it but have not gotten to the part where she starts disclosing the celebrity scandals, and I am almost done with the book, so I am guessing that the end is where all the celebrity names are going to be mentioned.

I have to admit, the book is pretty entertaining. Lots of sex, drugs and rock and roll. Throw in a little rape here and there, and it pretty much tells the life story of every porn star or stripper I have ever known. It also proves that the old adage that ladies love outlaws still rings true. it is just reality.

Speaking of reality, here is an offer you might want to take a look at, All Access Reality has a limited time offer. If you pay by check you can get a free 3 day trial, or only $1.00 if you pay by credit card.

I have looked at this offer, and they are giving you access to like 20 different sites, in all different niches. They have Asian, Anal, POV, Gangbang, Ebony, Gay, Throat Fucking and many more. I think this is one of those deals you need to grab while you can.

Tell them White Cheech sent you.

I was visiting the Naughty Witch Sex Blog, and she has found a new porn blog for your viewing pleasure.

Camel Toe Nude
Cool porn site. Camel Toe Nude. It has tons of free porn, porn site reviews, free porn galleries, free porn videos and so much more.

Camel Toe Nude even has found camel toe porn!

Go check out Naughty Witch for more details. I know I am.

The untold story. White Cheech has just learned from reliable sources that Donald Rumsfeld not only recently visited Iraq but arrived there with Paris Hilton and Condoleezza Rice!

You know that Rice is a very hot MILF, and with that little slut Paris Hilton, Donald is going to have some very heavy sex with those two.

Threesomes rule, and Rumsfeld got himself some good action there.

You youngsters think it is easy being the White Cheech, but it isn’t. Take this morning for example.

Last night I was out with this hot brunette until about 4 AM. We fucked like bunnies. It was great fun. I got to sleep about 5 and was blissfully dreaming of past conquests when I was awaken by the damn phone.

This MILF I have been seeing was calling me, wanting to come over. She likes the way I eat her pussy and wanted more. I told her to come over later this afternoon.

So how does a 51 year old playboy keep up with all this young pussy? Easy. I discovered these great penis pills. You can get them at this place called Ultra Herbal.

They have everything a guy could need. Virility Ex comes in pills, oils and patches, and I swear by them. Use all three, and the chicks can’t get enough. I don’t use viagra any more, because these pills make my cock longer and harder than viagra ever could. What good is a hardon if your cock is too small?

this site

getting things setup and ready for some fuck me hard, lets do it again filthy porn.

:P